About the Author
I tried my best to live the so-called “ordinary” life, but in 1990, with my personal and business world collapsing, and frustrated with my life and traditional dogma, I began my journey, my search for truth and the meaning of life. In the following seven years I read over 250 books on almost every New Age and self-help topic, as well as exploring various religions, trying to find the answers to my probing questions. While some books offered some part truths that felt right, something was always missing. I was searching for a common thread that would link all the part truths together, as I felt that then I would find and know the truth. As I ventured into the great unknown I had no guide, no sign posts, only my Mind and my feelings, which I didn't trust, to help me find what was missing in my life. I was blinded by a fog, aware only that I was searching for something but not knowing what I was searching for, how to find it, where to look for it, or to even know if I had found it when I did, and then what to do with it, when, and if I found it. While this outer search offered some part truths, something was always missing or didn’t feel right.
In 1994, I began my inner search when I was introduced to meditation. During the next three years, it expanded to include past life regression, astral journeys, channeling, shamanic, and multi-dimensional journeys. All these "tools" as I came to call them, not only expanded my conscious awareness, but also opened new frontiers and experiences for me. I continued to simultaneously explore my outer and inner reality, still looking for the common thread.
It wasn’t until early 1997 when I obtained the book, Right Use of Will (RUOW) by Ceanne DeRohan, that things began to click and make sense for me that "felt" right, even though I didn't understand it at the moment. I also found the common thread I was looking for. What I found that was common, was not what was being said, but what was not being said, what was being denied, and that was the major turning point in my search. It was at this time that I also began to keep detailed journals, not only of the channeled messages I was receiving, but also of my thoughts, feelings, emotions and experiences.
Reading the RUOW books opened my awareness to the role that denial was playing in my life. I then realized that all the tools I had been using were based in denial and needed to be changed. I also realized that I needed to combine the tools I had developed with the esoteric points-of-view and the emotional work that RUOW and my guides provided. I then modified the tools and changed them from a denial-based format (denial and suppression of feelings and emotions) to a non-denial format, where I would allow my feelings and emotions an opportunity to move and be expressed. This change allowed me to begin working on healing my inner and outer child issues and develop another tool that I called, Coequal Therapy. These tools or healing modalities are what I share in my first book, “Journeys from the Heart Centre - Meditation as a tool for healing and Self-empowerment.”
As I worked with these new tools, I began to merge and apply the insights and understandings I was getting on my inner experiences, with what I was experiencing in my outer reality and daily life. As I ventured further into this new and unknown emotional territory, it took me through feeling almost every possible emotion, as well as having some experiences that are beyond belief. I continued to write about my experiences, thoughts, feelings, emotions, insights and the channeled messages and guidance that I was receiving, knowing that I would be writing books, and that these entries would form the basis of these books.
Using the tools provided me with the mini healing steps, or stages that were necessary in order for me to get to not only the first level of healing, but also the subsequent levels. The initial mini healing steps or stages were experienced by using the tools like, clearing my astral plane, releasing attachments, working with my animal guides and totems, past lives, channeling, and especially in working with my inner and outer child. Using these tools provided me with the emotional, mental, and physical releases, as well as the ability to apply what I had experienced and learned to my daily life. In the course of my healing journey, I’ve discovered that what I was deliberately or ignorantly told, and naively believed, were flaws in my character and personality that I had to deny and control, were in actuality my strength and power, and is now where the healing needs to take place. It was, and still is, confusing and frustrating as I go through the gradual processes and the different stages and levels of healing. At times, I feel that I’m just going in circles, lost in a fog, and that I can’t see the tree for the forest. During these times I think and feel that healing is impossible, and that’s because I haven’t found and healed the real issues, and also that I’m not yet prepared to do so on a physical level.
It's important to note that when I was using the tools, I was in effect, planning and controlling my experiences in a safe and controlled environment. I usually had a specific intent and would use the meditation / visualization tools to put my mind in an altered state of consciousness to explore the underlying causes of the issues I was seeking answers to. While I had a specific intent for my journey, quite often what I experienced was not what I expected. While I did some of this work by myself, in most cases I was being guided by my partner that would also share her input during this process. While I was often activated during these journeys and would have strong emotional and physical releases, these were, in actuality, mini healings; they were not a major breakthrough that I’d later experience when I reached the first and subsequent levels of healing. These journeys, hindsights, mini healings, insights and understandings, all served to prepare me for the next big step or level of healing.
When I later experienced my major levels of healing, I had no conscious intent or knowledge that I was ready, and no warning that I was going to be activated into my issues by a real life experience. Of course, it never dawned on me at the time that if healing was my intent, that I would need to be activated by a real life situation, similar to the one I originally experienced, and was now ready to heal. But until I had that experience and gained that awareness where the proverbial light went on in my Mind, I just continued reacting to my old imprints, programs and beliefs; going in circles, and doing mini healings, all in preparation. When I was being activated during my first major level of healing, I realized that I had a choice as to whether or not I would allow myself to find my real issues and express my real emotions that were surfacing in the moment, or deny them and react as I had been doing all my life. In other words, this healing experience wasn’t a planned journey, and while I wasn’t prepared to be activated by a real life experience, I also knew that I was prepared and ready for it or it wouldn't be happening. It was this first level of healing that also gave me the insight and awareness of what false emotions were, and how imprinting and programming affected my Mind and its beliefs and judgments that it had falsely held as being the truth.
With the help of the RUOW material, my Spirit Guides, and using the tools I had developed, and the aid of my healing partner, I had my first major level of healing in 1999. My second level of healing was in 2000, when I had an awakening, where I was reborn, so to speak, as what I experienced was a 180-degree shift from what I had believed love was. Although that experience only lasted a few moments, it showed me the power of unconditional love and what was possible when I chose self-love and not the denial and self-hatred I was used to. Love was one thing that I didn’t expect to discover in my search for truth, as I believed that I was already a loving person. To begin to know the truth of what love is, I had to know what love is not. Experiencing and feeling what unconditional love felt like also opened me to feeling and understanding what denial really was, as any form of denial, whether conscious or not, makes the love that one experiences conditional, and you can feel the difference. Once I had this realization and insight, it was as if the fog or veil had been lifted and my journey became clearer, but at the same time, I was flooded with even more questions.
All of this work was, and the new work still is, experimental, and like Leonardo DaVinci, I consider myself a disciple of experience. I find myself not only being the scientist in search of truth and understanding, but also the test subject in having to submerge myself in the experiment so that I, the scientist, can experience the feelings and emotions and obtain the mental understandings that will allow me to know if my hypothesis is accurate and valid, and that real healing, change and growth is indeed possible when denials are ended. In other words, I need to "walk my talk" that then gives me, the "been there done that" understanding and knowing.
I don't have all the answers and my truth is evolving as is my consciousness, and what was true one day becomes a part truth the next, when what was hidden is revealed. I find that I’m constantly being activated by either some new levels of old issues, or some entirely new issues that are coming up for healing and understanding. In each case, I have to learn by trial and error, until I finally "get it" and know how to heal them and it’s then that I gain the understandings I was looking for, that enables me to proceed to the next level of healing. I’ve also come to realize that there is no “quick fix” and that this is indeed a process and a journey. My journey continues as I search for, and put the pieces of the puzzle together, to live in truth without denial. Now, I’m on the journey to heal other aspects of my Being and to integrate this new awareness into the physical world, to “walk my talk,” to manifest and live in the world and a creation, I have yet to dream and imagine.
If you would like to know more about my personal background before I began my journey, or of my experiences during my journey, other than what I’ve shared here, you can find more information in my books. What I want to share here is just a very brief summary of how I started my journey and how I came to write, what is now, a trilogy. My first book provides the meditation/visualization tools or healing modalities that I developed and used on my journey, as well as some basic insights and understandings needed when using them. The second book provides a host of insights and understandings related to healing and self-empowerment, as well as the three levels of healing that I’ve experienced and the insights associated with them. And my third book is an autobiography of my journey that outlines the trials and tribulations I went through to reach the levels of healing I’ve experienced, as well as numerous channeled messages that guided and helped me on my journey.
If you would like to know more about my personal background before I began my journey, or of my experiences during my journey, other than what I’ve shared here, you can find more information in my books. What I want to share here is just a very brief summary of how I started my journey and how I came to write, what is now, a trilogy. My first book provides the meditation/visualization tools or healing modalities that I developed and used on my journey, as well as some basic insights and understandings needed when using them. The second book provides a host of insights and understandings related to healing and self-empowerment, as well as the three levels of healing that I’ve experienced and the insights associated with them. And my third book is an autobiography of my journey that outlines the trials and tribulations I went through to reach the levels of healing I’ve experienced, as well as numerous channeled messages that guided and helped me on my journey.
Mission Statement
I know that what I’ve found, others are also searching for and hope to find, and this is what I want to share. To find the love, joy and the magic in our Hearts and to share the expression of who we really are, is true life. What I share is what I have lived and personally experienced, felt, and know in my Heart, and can’t be studied in any present form and thus, the reason for writing my books. While this journey into the unknown can be frightening, it is also exciting as it feels right, with a simple knowing that can’t be described but is heartfelt.
I feel that my purpose and mission in this lifetime is that of a healer and a Wayshower, first as a healer of self, and then in helping and showing others how to heal and empower themselves. My Vision and intent is to be a part of creating the New World from the inside out. By healing and changing the inside, we therefore empower ourselves to create the outer reality and world we desire with unconditional love, to allow those of us who choose to do so, to live life as an expression of who we really are, and not the illusion as we have been doing.
I believe that true healing can take place when we are in balance, when we can accept and express all our thoughts, ideas, feelings, emotions and desires without fear, denial, judgment, guilt or shame. I believe that true freedom and self-empowerment can be actualized when we are able to be fully present, to live in the present or now moment, no longer controlled by our old imprints, programs and beliefs that limit our consciousness and our experience, and the expression of who we really are. This is my vision and desire for the New World, and of bringing Heaven to Earth. It is my intent that the thoughts, insights, feelings and emotions that I share, will not only expand your consciousness, but also activate your emotions and touch your Heart and in turn, assist you on your healing journey.
Although it took me eleven years to move from the first stirrings of my consciousness, through the process of finding the tools I needed, learning how to use them, to finally entering the gap and reaching my awakening point, that of bringing consciousness to the unconscious, it will not take you that long. I not only share the tools that I’ve developed and used, but I also share my personal experiences and insights that will help guide you on your journey. It is only your intent and dedication to healing and finding self-love, that will determine your journey.
Namaste
John Rieger aka Shenreed
