About the Author
I was born in 1944, in the province of Saskatchewan, Canada. In 1966, I moved to the province of Ontario to continue my education as an electronics technologist. I was married in 1969 and we had two children. I worked for several companies and then started my own business in 1980. While we eventually had the money, houses, cars, and all the "toys," that still didn't make us or me happy, and in 1989 we separated and filed for divorce. If you would like to know more about my personal background before I began my journey, and more of my journey than what I am sharing here, you can read it in my third book, "Journeys to the Heart Centre"
In 1990, my personal and business world was collapsing and frustrated with my life and traditional dogma; I began my journey, my search for truth and the meaning of life. In the following seven years I read over 250 books on almost every "New Age" topic, trying to find answers to my probing questions. As I ventured into the great unknown I had no guide, no sign posts, only my mind and my feelings, which I didn't trust, to help me find what was missing in my life. I was blinded by a fog, aware only that I was searching for something but not knowing what I was searching for, how to find it, where to look for it, or to even know if I had found it when I did, and then what to do with it, when, and if I found it. While this outer search offered some part truths, something was always missing.
In 1994, I also began my inner search when I was introduced to meditation. During the next three years, it expanded to include past life regression, astral journeys, channeling, shamanic journeys, multi-dimensional journeys All these "tools" as I call them, not only expanded my conscious awareness, but also opened new frontiers and experiences for me. I continued to simultaneously explore my outer and inner reality still looking for the common thread.
It was in early 1997 that I obtained the book, Right Use of Will (R.U.O.W.) by Ceanne DeRohan, that things began to click and make sense for me that "felt" right, even though I didn't understand it at the moment. I also found the common thread I was looking for. What I found that was common, was not what was being said, but what was not being said, that was being denied, and that was the major turning point in my search. It was at this time that I also began to keep more detailed journals, not only of the channeled messages I was receiving, but also of my thoughts, feelings, emotions and experiences.
Reading the R.U.O.W. books opened my awareness to the role that denial was playing in my life. I then realized that all the tools I had been using were all based in denial and that now I now needed to combine the "tools" that I had developed with the esoteric points-of-view and the emotional work that R.U.O.W. provided. I then modified my tools and changed them from a denial based format (denial and suppression of feelings and emotions) to a non-denial format, where I would allow my feelings and emotions an opportunity to move and be expressed. This change allowed me to begin working on healing my inner and outer child issues and develop another tool that I called, Coequal Therapy. These are the "tools" or healing modalities that I now share in my first book, "Journeys from the Heart Centre."
As I worked with these new tools, I also began to merge and apply the insights and understandings I was getting on my inner experiences, with those of my outer life experiences. As I ventured further into this new and unknown "emotional" territory, it took me through feeling almost every possible emotion as well as some experiences that are beyond belief. I continued to write about my experiences, thoughts, feelings, emotions, insights and the channeled messages and guidance that I was receiving, knowing that I would be writing books, and that these entries would form the basis of these books. It was, and still is, confusing and frustrating as I go through the gradual processes and the different stages and levels of healing and at times I feel that I'm just going in circles and that I "can't see the tree for the forest."
Using the "tools" provided me with the little mini healing steps or stages and they were and are required in order for me to get to, not only the first level, but also the subsequent levels of healing. The initial little healing steps or stages were found by using the tools like clearing my astral plane and attachment releases, working with my animal guides and totems, past lives, channeling and especially in working with my inner and outer child. Using these tools provided me with the emotional, mental and physical releases as well as the ability to apply what I had experienced and learned to my daily life. All these little steps prepared me for what is to come, the next step.
It's important to realize that when I was using the tools, I was in effect, planning and controlling my experiences. I usually had a specific intent and I was using the meditation / visualization "tools" to help me get my mind, my consciousness to a specific situation or experience while in a meditative state and in most cases, I was also being guided. While I was often activated during these little journeys and I'd have strong emotional and physical releases, these were in actuality, mini healings; they were not the major breakthrough releases that I'd later experience when I reached the first step or level of healing. These journeys, hind-sights, mini healings, insights and understandings served to prepare me for the next big step or level of healing.
When I was ready to move to the next step or level of healing I had no warning that I was going to be activated into my issues with a real life situation and experience. Of course it never dawned on me at the time, that I would need to be in a real life situation and be activated to heal my issues and so I re-acted to my old programming until I finally saw the light go on in my mind. Once activated and knowing what I had previously experienced when doing all my little journeys and steps that I've mentioned, I then realized that I had a choice as to whether or not I would allow myself to find my real issue and to express my real emotions that were surfacing as a result of the activation. In other words, it was not a planned journey and I was not prepared to be activated by a real life situation, but I also knew that I was prepared and ready for this healing experience, or I wouldn't be experiencing it. It was this first level of healing that also gave me the insight and awareness of what "false" emotions were and how imprinting and programming also affected my mind.
With the help of the R.U.O.W material, my spiritual guidance and using the tools I had developed, I had a level of healing in 1997, and then again in 2000 when I had an awakening, where I was reborn, so to speak, as what I experienced was a 180-degree shift from what I had believed love was. Although that awakening experience only lasted a few moments, it showed me the power of love, what was possible when I chose self-love and not denial of self. Love was one thing that I didn't expect to discover in my search for truth, as I believed that I was already a "loving" person. To begin to know the truth of what love is, I had to know what love is not. Knowing what love was, also opened me to knowing what denial was. Once I had this realization and insight, it was as if the fog, or veil, had been lifted and my journey became clearer, but at the same time, I was flooded with even more questions.
All of this work was, and the new work still is, experimental. Like Leonardo da Vinci, I consider myself a disciple of experience. I find myself not only being the scientist in search of truth and understanding, but also being the test subject in having to submerge myself in the experience so that I, the scientist, can experience the feelings and obtain the understandings that will allow me to know if my hypothesis is accurate and valid and that real healing, change and growth is indeed possible when denials are ended. In other words, to "walk my talk" that then gives me, the "been there done that" understanding and knowing.
It was, and still is, a confusing and frustrating journey at times, as I'd go through the gradual healing processes and the different stages or levels of healing. At times, I felt I was just going in circles and that healing was impossible. In the course of my healing journey I also discovered that what I was deliberately or ignorantly told, and naively believed were flaws in my character and personality that I had to deny or control, were, in actuality my strength and power and this is where the healing needs to take place.
I don't have all the answers and I'm constantly being activated by either some new levels of old issues or some entirely new issues that are coming up for healing and understanding. In each case, I have to learn by trial and error, until I finally "get it" and know how to heal them and it's then that I gain the understanding I was looking for, that then enables me to proceed to the next level of healing. My truth is always evolving and expanding as my consciousness evolves. I've also come to realize that there is no "quick fix" and that this is indeed a process and a journey. My journey continues as I search for, and put the pieces of the puzzle together, to live in truth without denial. Now, I'm on the journey to heal other aspects of me and to integrate this new awareness into the physical world, to "walk my talk," to manifest and live in the world and a creation, I have yet to dream and imagine.
Mission Statement
I know that what I've found, others search for and hope to find and this is what I want to share. To find the love, joy and the magic in our hearts and to share the expression of who we really are is true life. What I share is what I have lived and personally experienced, felt and know in my heart, and can't be studied in any present form and thus, the reason for writing my books. While this journey into the unknown is frightening, it is also exciting as it "feels" right, with a simple knowing that can't be described but is heart felt.
I feel that my purpose and mission in life is that of a healer and a Wayshower, first as a healer of self and then in teaching others how to heal and empower themselves. My Vision and intent is to be a part of creating the New World from the inside out. By healing and changing the "inside," we therefore empower ourselves to create the "outside" world we desire with unconditional love, to allow those of us who choose to do so, to live life as an expression of who we really are, and to live a life not in fear, denial, guilt, shame and conditional love as we have been doing.
I believe that true healing can take place when we are in balance, when we can accept and express all our thoughts, ideas, feelings, emotions and desires without fear, denial, judgment, guilt or shame. I believe that true freedom and self-empowerment can be actualized when we are able to be fully present, to live in the present or now moment, no longer controlled by our old imprints, programs and beliefs that limit our consciousness and our experience, and the expression of who we really are. This is my vision and desire for the New World, and of bringing Heaven to Earth. It is my intent that the thoughts, insights, feelings and emotions that I share, will not only expand your consciousness, but also activate your emotions and touch your heart and in turn, assist you on your healing journey.
Although it took me eleven years to move from the first stirrings of my consciousness, through the process of finding the tools I needed, learning how to use them, to finally entering the gap and reaching my awakening point, that of bringing consciousness to the unconscious, it will not take you that long. I not only share the "tools" that I've developed and used but I also share my personal experiences and insights that will help guide you on your journey. It is only your intent and dedication to heal and find self-love that will determine your journey.
John Rieger aka Shenreed
Healing begins in the Heart
